This episode opens with Heather entering a cake shop to meet
with a cake decorator, one with whom she has worked before. She is celebrating
the official launch of her sparkling wine in Napa, and she wants a cake made to
look like the bottle for the occasion. The wine is named “Collette” after her
daughter. Heather also makes it a point to call her line “sparkling wine”, not
“champagne”, because something can only be called “champagne” if it comes from
the certain region in France… And before you call me “Fancy-pants”, I will tell
you that I only know that because I love wine, and I am a Francophile…
Apparently this is the same cake decorator that made the infamous bowed cake
for Heather’s name changing party. There is a flashback to the bow-eating incident,
but disappointingly, they did not include the iconic “Is this the world we live
in?” scene.
Shannon and David are still at the retreat, and Shannon
shares some divorce statistics with us including the fact that in the OC, the
divorce rate is 70%. Shannon does not want to be part of this percentage.
However, Shannon clearly thought seriously about divorce if she did enough
research to find out these statistics. As part of the retreat Shannon and David
write their own eulogies for the other to read at their mock funerals. These
mock funerals were complete with black cloths and headstones. I know the point
of the exercise was to get the two of them to think about what a life without
the other would be like, and I’m sure it’s effective, but it’s also very morbid…
David reads what Shannon has written, and he starts crying. Shannon says David
never cries, so she has hope that this experience will help them move past the
affair.
Next we see Tamra and Heather meet for juice… That’s right…
juice. Now that juice bars are en vogue, I guess that’s what people do… Tamra
says Heather is the only one in the group she trusts right now, yet last week
when we saw Tamra have surgery, she tried to garner viewer pity and said she
wasn’t close with anyone… Heather tells her about the party in Napa for the
wine launch and that all of the girls will be there. Tamra reacts badly to the
fact that she will be forced to socialize with Lizzie. Heather says if she and
Shannon can be cordial, then so can Tamra and Lizzie. Out of nowhere, Tamra
starts to fake cry, and even Heather seems not to believe it, asking why she is
about to start crying… Tamra says that she lost herself, and Heather says she
will help Tamra get back what she has lost.
At the retreat the therapist asks Shannon and David if their
kids know about the affair. Shannon divulges that one of her daughters found
the texts between David and his mistress on his cell phone while he had moved
out of the house. The therapist tells them that in cases of infidelity the fear
is that the one cheated on will never truly forgive the cheater. However, Shannon
and David claim that they want to move past this, and they take the final steps
to truly and sincerely apologize for what happened. The therapist says it can
take up to 2 years for forgiveness to become fully realized, but I ask does one
ever really get over infidelity? There will always be doubt and suspicion
acting like poison in the marriage. I hope the best for them, but it will not
be quick or easy. In leaving the retreat, Shannon says she has 100% forgiven
David.
So far the juxtaposition of the two strained marriages this
season is very interesting. Shannon and David are recognizing their issues and
trying to work on them, but Meghan and Jim seem to be ignoring the clear issues
they are having. We see Meghan and Jim shopping to redecorate their house, the
one that Jim and his second ex-wife built and decorated together. Meghan wants
to buy all new things, but Jim feels they should not buy things that they
already have. Jim doesn’t seem to want to get rid of the old stuff, but I don’t
think he realizes that in keeping things the same as they were in his old
marriage, he’s keeping around old memories and not allowing Meghan to make her
own memories and stamps on his life… Jim is leaving for work in another part of
the country, and Meghan is worried about the stress it will put on their
marriage. Jim does not seem concerned and says that Meghan has new friends now
to keep her occupied… Is anyone else having flashbacks to Camille and Kelsey
Grammer?
Shannon and David get home from the retreat, and as part of
the forgiveness process, David apologizes individually to his three daughters.
Of course the three girls forgive him, and the eldest daughter makes a very
mature statement saying that she will never forget, but she will forgive him.
Tamra and Eddie are making dinner, and Vicki calls while she
is in Mexico. Vicki says Mexico makes her think of Tamra… Tequila and regret
makes Vicki think of Tamra, really? I would have never guessed… Tamra passive-aggressively
suggests that she’s surprised that Brooks can travel while on chemo, and Vicki
says that he’s doing fine right now, and Eddie coughs “bulls**t” in the
background… Tamra blames all of their problems on Brooks, but changes her tune
later when she’s talking to Vicki face to face… Vicki invites them to a Mexican
themed party at her house, and Tamra says she is taking that as an apology. I’m
not sure what Vicki needs to apologize to Tamra for, but whatever makes her
feel better…
Jimmy and Meghan go to Heather’s house so the couples can go
to Vicki’s party together. Heather is very relieved that this will be the first
time the ladies get together as a group. This will be a test-run for the Napa
trip. Meghan is nervous to meet Vicki, as she should be, but she must not know
much about Vicki, as she also expects Vicki to be nervous to meet her. Vicki is
so used to meeting and hating the new housewives who seem to come and go very
quickly, there is no way she is nervous to meet Meghan.
Vicki’s party is in full swing when Tamra and Eddie arrive.
Despite how upset Tamra was to hear that Lizzie was invited on the Napa trip,
she acted completely unfazed when the two of them spoke for a while at Vicki’s
party. Vicki and Tamra exchange some awkward moments including Vicki basically
shoving a piece of fish down Tamra’s throat. When Shannon enters the party, she
walks right past Tamra to Vicki without acknowledging Tamra or even looking at
her… Brooks tells Tamra that his cancer is “highly curable”, and he seems to have
a good and positive attitude about the situation. Tamra asks him about some
specifics about his chemo, and he gives a very vague and uniformed answer. He
is not making himself look good with regard to the notion that the cancer might
not be real.
Tamra sees Jeana enter the party, and she runs over to hug
her… They seem to have come a long way since Tamra threw red wine in Jeana’s
face… Tamra also took this opportunity to greet and hug Shannon who was
standing right next to Jeana. Shannon of course was surprised at the unwelcomed
hug and was very short with Tamra… Jeana has lost a lot of weight and looks
fantastic. Tamra tells us that she and Jeana are in a better place now because
Jeana was there as moral support for Tamra while she was going through custody
battles, a job she thought Vicki would handle.
Vicki tries covertly to compliment the “aura” of romance
surrounding Shannon and David, suggesting that they seem to be in such a great
place. If I were Shannon, I would be mad at Vicki for bringing unwanted
attention to the relationship. Shannon has not told anyone else about David’s
infidelity, and by Vicki randomly pointing out that they’re happy and in love,
it would make one who knows nothing about the affair ask, “Well why wouldn’t
they be? What’s going on in their marriage?” And you can tell Shannon does experience
some of these feelings by her fake smile, which Lizzie sees right through.
In a short scene of Brooks discussing his new diet with
Tamra, he says he eats a lot of beans. This sparks a conversation on farting… I
could have done without that, Bravo editors… Thank you so much…
I should take
this opportunity to talk about Katie Hamilton. She was reported to be the
newest housewife on RHOC this season, but midway through filming, her husband
blindsided her with divorce, and we later found out that he was allegedly using
drugs. These devastating life events caused Katie to stop filming and pull out
of her housewife slot. While this is extremely sad for Katie and her kids, it
is also somewhat sad for us as viewers. From the little we see of Katie in this
episode, I think she would have been an excellent addition to the show. She
seems refreshingly real in her personality. But I’m sure we all understand that
under those circumstances, anyone would need to pull herself from public eye
and become a little reclusive. I believe I saw someone say on Twitter that
Katie would have been the new Alexis of RHOC… Sure… They’re the exact same, oh
yeah except Katie seems intelligent…and real…and not pretentious…do I need to
continue?
Heather, Meghan, and Katie arrive at the party, and Meghan
introduces herself to Vicki as if they had never met, but Vicki remembers
immediately that she had met Meghan before. Meghan then moves on to greet
Shannon. Shannon replies with a, “Nice to meet you,” and Meghan simultaneously
says, “Nice to see you,”… Awkward!... Meghan then seems almost offended that
Shannon does not remember meeting her last year at Heather’s hoedown, yet she
seemed to expect that Vicki would not remember meeting her… Strange… Anyway,
Shannon clearly does not remember Meghan at all, yet Meghan seems convinced
that Shannon dislikes her for flirting with David at the hoedown. All I can say
is Meghan needs to get over herself. Shannon has more important things to worry
about than the existence of Meghan Edmonds. Considering David’s infidelity,
Shannon probably remembers David flirting, but she more than likely doesn’t
remember the recipient of the flirting.
Last year Vicki was hiding her relationship with Brooks and
almost seemed ashamed of it, but this year he is with her constantly and has
even moved in with her. Heather suggests that it is Brook’s illness that has
caused them to realize that they need to celebrate their times together because
life is so precious, fleeting, and all that sappy stuff… While this is probably
very true and valid, I think there is another underlying reason that is more
salient to Vicki, and that is Brianna. Last year Brianna was still living in
the OC, and she had a small child with another one on the way. Vicki is very
much about family, and she wanted to spend as much time with them as she could.
Since Brianna does not like Brooks in the slightest, Vicki knew that if she
wanted to spend time with her child and grandchild, she would have to make
Brooks secondary…or really tertiary because we all know that Vicki’s work comes
right after her children in order of importance.
Heather congratulates Vicki on her winning an award, which
is why she will not be going to Napa with the ladies. Shannon is quick to
express her displeasure with this. She is not happy to be basically alone with
Heather and Tamra, but right now she is all about forgiving and moving on, so
she’s going to give it a shot.
As an aside, I must say that watching drunk women try to
break open a piñata while wearing Louboutins in grass is incredibly
entertaining. Bravo needs to jump on that idea quickly…but I want a piece of
the profits… Lizzie and Shannon notice that Tamra and Vicki are holding hands,
and Shannon tells Vicki later that she was surprised by that considering that
Vicki said she was done with Tamra. Shannon says that she can move on too, but
she doesn’t think that needs to involve holding hands.
Before the party ends, the ladies gather together to take a
tequila shot, which is appropriate since this is the first time the whole group
of them has been together. I have to point out though, that Heather is seen
pretending to take the shot, but turns and pours it out. Honestly, I would have
done the same thing, but she better hope that Vicki doesn’t see that…
After everyone else leaves, Tamra and Vicki have a sit down
to discuss the constant up and down of their friendship for the past few years,
and I must say as a viewer, it’s starting to get exhausting and episodic. At
the beginning of every season they make up, then by the season finale and
reunion, they’re screaming at each other and proclaiming that they’re “done”.
It’s getting a little old… Tamra brings up that she has been going through a
hard time, but Vicki doesn’t let that fly. She starts reading off a litany of
issues she has been facing, the last of which is Brooks and his cancer. She
makes it seems a lot worse than Brooks did during his conversation with Tamra
earlier. Vicki throws around phrases like “fighting for his life” and “stage 3
cancer”, very serious things. Tamra says the turning point was the party at
Heather’s where they had their first big fight about Brooks and people were throwing
around the “evil eye”… Tamra says she wants to move on, but it seems that trust
is completely gone between the two of them. Tamra says that she will take 100%
of the blame if that’s what it takes to move forward. She is sorry that she
ever doubted the relationship between Brooks and Vicki. They both say they are
not ready to give up on their friendship, so they are officially burying the
hatchet. Recall that earlier in the episode Tamra blamed all of their problems
on Brooks. Now that she is face to face with Vicki, Tamra changes her tune. The
problems started with Brooks, but she is now taking all of the blame. That was
a quick blame shift… Who buys that these two will ever be back to what they had
pre-Brooks? Yeah, me neither…
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