Photo courtesy of the-flack.com
The last episode was full of different housewives’ events
and even more planning for future events. For the most part, it was a tame
episode, but it served to move plot lines forward for more confrontations, one
at the end of the present episode between Janet and Gina…but I’ll get to that
in a bit.
The episode starts with Chyka and Janet going shopping. They
discuss Gina’s “surprise” appearance at Chyka’s event. Janet says Gina entered
like “Darth Vader”. Chyka admits that she knew Gina was going to show up at the
event, but she kept it from the other ladies. Janet says in her confessional,
“It’s easy for Chyka to be neutral when she’s not being attacked.” I suppose
Janet has taken a sip of Andrea’s delusion inducing Not-So-Kool-Ade. Lucky for
you, I have not, so I remember what actually happened. I seem to recall three
grown women ambushing Gina at a dinner table resulting in a heated and
aggressive confrontation.
Next we see Gina visit a dating service for business owners
and professionals. She tells us that she hasn’t been single since age 14… We
won’t think about how long ago that was… She also says she hasn’t dated in 8
years. She admits to the dating service representative that she sometimes
cross-examines guys with whom she is in a relationship. The guys don’t seem to
like that. Considering we know Gina has made witnesses cry, I can see why guys
might run away from that. Since she just got out of a long relationship, Gina
says she is reserved and doesn’t know if she’s ready to date yet.
Lydia and her housekeeper, Joanna, have a strange
relationship. Lydia treats her like a friend, but she makes sure she still
comes across as dominant so Joanna knows who is in charge. Lydia marvels at Joanna’s
kitchen techniques, which most people would call “cutting vegetables”… Yes, you
picked up on the shade correctly… Lydia was actually interested in how Joanna
cut her vegetables. Lydia asks Joanna to help her pick out some different
outfits. Apparently, Joanna has an interest in fashion and keeps Lydia on point
with her fashion choices. To be honest, I haven’t noticed anything overly
fabulous in Lydia’s wardrobe. She needs to start living up to the Real
Housewife title… Lydia says Joanna is more than a housekeeper; she’s a friend.
She’s Lydia’s “house-friend”.
Jackie and Ben meet with someone who brings over the
packaging for their La Mascara line of alcoholic beverages. Jackie asks Chyka,
who with her husband has marketed a successful business, to give her opinion on
the packaging. Chyka calls the packaging “fabulous”, and I tend to agree.
However, Ben and Jackie still have a long way to go in bottling and even
creating the product that will eventually go into the packaging. I understand
the importance of aesthetics; I stupidly favor form over function. But in this
case, the actual product should be the focus. Sure someone will buy a cocktail
or bottle of wine because the packaging looks cool and fun, but once they taste
a horrid product inside, they will not buy it again. So I would put a little
more emphasis on the actual product first.
Next we see Lydia, Andrea, Gina, and Chyka as they go on a
shopping excursion. This read completely false to me. It had to have been a
producer set-up. There is no way Andrea and Gina would voluntarily be in the
same place at the same time. I imagine they were threatened by production and
were compelled to comply. I guess production felt they needed a little more
awkwardness and drama. Lydia and Chyka first pick up Gina at her house. Gina
gets into the limo, and Lydia could not be more fake. She acts like she has no
problem with Gina. There’s a huge difference between being cordial and being
friendly. Lydia was being friendly… Lydia even feigns concern by asking Gina if
she will be okay with Andrea while shopping together. Gina gives Lydia a look
and fake smile as if to say, “Bitch, I’d rather not be here, but I have no
choice…” The ladies then pick up Andrea, who apparently didn’t know that Gina
would be riding in the limo with them. She says she would have rather taken a
taxi. Did she expect Gina would be riding on the roof of the limo?... Of course
it works out that Gina and Andrea are forced to sit next to each other. They
completely ignore each other, and Andrea, being the uncreative type, pulls a
Gina and starts putting on makeup during the conversation. (You may recall Gina
doing the exact same thing while being berated at the dinner table in Mission
Beach.) Gina says Andrea doesn’t care if she’s dead or alive.
Later, while the ladies are in the store, which I should
point had not even been open to the public yet, more awkwardness and silence
ensues. Any time Gina and Andrea were around each other, it seemed they would
both be silent. As soon as one left, the other would start talking up a storm.
It was during one such time that Gina announced to Lydia and Chyka that she is
having an event for cancer awareness and fund raising called “Girl’s Night In”.
She isn’t sure if she will invite Andrea. Lydia fires back at Gina that she
needs to get over all of their issues. Lydia then runs to Andrea at the first
opportunity to tell her about the event and how she most likely won’t be
invited. Andrea will not be outdone. How does she respond? She pulls the idea
of a “day of pampering” out of her ass… Yeah, a spa day is right on par with a
fundraiser for cancer research… Andrea says she doesn’t know if she will invite
Gina. I was waiting with bated breath for the ever levelheaded Lydia to tell
Andrea to get over all the drama. Of course I’m being sarcastic. If that were
true I would not be writing this because I would be dead… Lydia instead shows
her hypocrisy by saying Gina shouldn’t be invited because of her behavior…
Next we see Jackie and Ben in the recording studio. Jackie
tells Ben that she invited Janet to stop by, and Ben seems a little irritated.
I can’t say I blame him. That’s like having your spouse invite a friend to your
office for a gossip session in the middle of the workday. First of all, why?
And second, you’re never going to be productive… Ben asks them to sit in the
back of the studio and be quiet while he works. Yeah, good luck with that one,
Ben… Jackie and Janet start talking, and at one point, Jackie even shushed Ben
whose work and productivity are interrupting the ladies chitchat. While they
are at the studio, Gina calls Jackie and invites her to the Girls Night In.
Janet, eavesdropping on the speakerphone conversation, says if Gina asks her to
go, she will because it’s for a good cause.
Now to the part of the episode I know you all loved the
most…the dog party! I must say I like dogs, but I am not a “dog person”. I
don’t get the appeal of a dog party. But I won’t judge…too much… Janet arrives
with her dogs who seem to be very anti-social; they don’t want to leave their cozy
Louis Vuitton home. Andrea arrives and again harps on the fact that Gina hasn’t
yet apologized, and that’s all she wants… Allow me to flash back for a moment. If
you recall, Gina started to apologize at Mission Beach when Janet first
confronted her. However, before she had the chance to fully apologize, Andrea
jumped into the conversation and completely became aggressive, thus causing
Gina to become defensive. Gina thinks Andrea deserves to apologize to her…
Jackie, in my opinion, is the voice of reason in this situation. She is amazed
at the level of crazy of these women for having and attending a dog party. The
party is catered complete with cupcakes made especially for the dogs. As Jackie
said, some kids don’t get parties this grand. Chyka says her business will not
be expanding into catering dog parties. I thought this party couldn’t get any
more ridiculous, but then they pulled out the dog costumes… I think I’ll just
leave it there. I’ve had people ask me to critique the dogs’ outfits as I would
any housewives, and I am entertaining the idea. If I get enough requests for
it, I will do it. So leave a comment if you want me to do it.
Ben and Jackie are looking for a venue for their La Mascara
launch party. However, they still don’t have a product yet. But the angels are
on Jackie’s side. Ben asks a very important question that anyone starting a new
business for the first time would ask. What happens if their drink line is a
flop? Jackie doesn’t want to hear the negativity. She says he better sell more
records. That’s a great answer to an important question…
Gina goes on a blind date with a guy named Daryl. She says
she has never gone on a blind date. She quickly follows that fact up saying she
is not disappointed… Must be nice. I’ve been on several blind dates, and each
one was worse than the last… Gina and Daryl have a good connection and
chemistry, and she hopes to see him again.
During the car ride to the Melbourne Cup party, Lydia tells
Jackie and Andrea some news. Gina had called Lydia and told her that Janet said
that Lydia was “brainless”. Luckily for us, we actually saw that exchange; it
isn’t just hearsay. Andrea says Gina is trying to turn Janet and Lydia against
each other. For once, I can see where Andrea is coming from. It seems Gina
wants to get more of the girls on her side while at the same time giving Janet
a little payback for what she told Lydia and Andrea. At the party, a TV
personality is introduced, and the cameras catch Lydia whispering to Jackie
“We’re the stars…” I’d hold off on saying that if I were Lydia. Their show
hadn’t even started airing at that time. They were still unknown… Lydia pulls
Janet aside and confronts her about the “brainless” comment. Janet swears she
didn’t say it. Janet says that the comment was that Lydia wasn’t very bright,
but a flashback to the previous conversation shows that’s not true… Thank you
shady editors. We can always count on you… Janet knows that Gina is paying her
back for telling Lydia and Andrea about calling them “c**ts” and the rest of
the bathroom talk. Lydia is happy that Janet “owned it”. But did she really?
She owned the fact that she insulted Lydia behind her back, but she lied about
what she actually said. I don’t count that as owning it. Janet is naturally
pissed at Gina, and they sit down to talk in the next scene.
Gina and Janet meet for drinks, and it seems Janet knows
it’s not going to go well. She orders a glass of wine because she doesn’t like
“dry arguments”. Gina begins by inviting Janet to her Girls Night In event.
Gina, who is also inviting Lydia, says Lydia is fine with her. We know that’s
not true, but Gina wouldn’t know that considering how Lydia has been acting
toward her. Janet launches into the main reason she is there, which is to
confront Gina for telling Lydia that she called her “brainless”. Janet calls
Gina a bitch, and she wants to know what else she’s told them so she can do
some damage control. The topic of the legal email comes up again, but we keep
hearing two different sides, and it’s impossible to know who is telling the
truth. Janet admits that she thought the behavior at the dinner table in
Mission Beach was acceptable and warranted. In response, Gina says that’s the
end of their friendship. Janet’s not listening to Gina, and she says Gina
should apologize to all of them. She says Gina should hope Chyka remains
neutral otherwise she won’t have any friends, and then Janet leaves.
Next week’s season finale promises more drama and more
arguments… Make sure to bring your deck of cards…
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